GUNS: TRUMP CALLS FOR MODEST
TIGHTENING OF |
BACKGROUND CHECKS,
ARMING TEACHERS
Right: teachers in Florida select a weapon on their way to class. |
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WORLD NEWS |
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Russia Denies Assassinations,
Election Meddling
Denies it's a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. |
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U.S. Drops to 18th Among
Happiest Countries
Soars to first among Nutsiest Countries. |
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ALSO IN THE NEWS ... |
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Stormy Daniels Offers
to Return $130,000 Hush Money
Mostly in ones and fives. |
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U. S. NEWS |
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Republican Report on Russia
Finds No Collusion
All depends on what definition of no is. |
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Trump Fires Cabinet Member Who
Called Him Fucking Moron
Not the one who called him dumber-than-dirt
douchebag or the one who called him
shit-for-brains asswipe. |
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REMINDER |
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You're only as smart as your phone. |
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Report: Trump Wants Right
To Send Secret Service to
Polling Stations During Election
To prevent meddling by non-Russians. |
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Pentagon Pitches More Modest
Parade Than Trump Wanted,
Without Tanks
Or goosestepping. |
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Every Homeless Veteran Could
Be Fed for Cost of Trump's Military Parade
With enough left over to feed every homeless
ex-White House staffer. |
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