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Ironic Times

 NO. 1025 “Expect the Ironic” MAY 25 - 31, 2020 

May 18
June 1
  AMERICANS CAUTIOUSLY VENTURE OUT AGAIN ON HOLIDAY WEEKEND
Careful to maintain social distancing.
 
WORLD NEWS
England: 1 in 5 Believe
Coronavirus a Hoax

Perpetrated by anti-monarchist Scots.
 
TRENDS
Survey: Children Swearing
More During Pandemic

“When's fuckin' kindergarten going to open?” asks one precocious five-year-old.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS ...
White House Defends President Golfing During Pandemic
“He needs a break from tweeting,” says aide.
U. S. NEWS
Trump Says He's Been
Taking Hydroxychloroquine,
Despite Warnings

“Guy on TV said 'what have you got to lose?'”
Report: Administration
Recruiting Doctors Who
Will Echo Trump Line

Project codenamed “Calling All Quacks” proceeding with haste.
 
REMINDER
  It's Friday, do you know where your Inspector General is?
 
82% Say Universal Healthcare
Needed During Pandemic

After it's over they say it should return to being a contract perk.
Study: Talking Can Generate
Coronavirus Droplets That
Linger Up to 14 Minutes

Public urged to stop talking.
 
POLITICS
49 of 50 Governors
Have Higher Approval
Rating Than President

“My TV ratings are better,” he points out.
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