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Ironic Times

 NO. 654 “Expect the Ironic” MARCH 25 - 31, 2013 

Mar 18
Apr 1
WHITE HOUSE PETITION CALLS FOR POLITICIANS TO WEAR NASCAR-LIKE ADVERTISING
And keep all their cash bribes in a clear plastic globe on their desk.
 
WORLD NEWS
Obama: Iran One Year Away
From Building a Nuke

Whereas Israel is turning them out like matzoh balls.
Another Putin Critic Living
In Exile Commits Suicide

Once again by stabbing self in foot with poison-tipped umbrella.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS ...
Two Living Popes Meet for First Time in More Than 600 Years
At dry cleaners.
U. S. NEWS
Congress Spares Meat Inspectors
From Sequester Cuts

Saving an estimated 800,000 lives.
Family Research Council Says
Society Should Punish Those
Who Have Premarital Sex

By forcing them to join Family Research Council.
 
REMINDER
  The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is about twenty cops with guns.
 
GOP Opposes Extension of
Lifeline Program to Ensure
Old, Poor Have Phone to Call
For Help in Emergency

Because we already have too many old, poor.
Effort to Keep White House
Open for Public Tours by
Diverting Money From Elvis
Music Boat in Georgia Fails

Keeping nation’s priorities in order.
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