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BUSH MAKES ROUNDS
GIVING EXIT INTERVIEWS |
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Hopes friendly televised chats
favorably influence future grand
jurors. |
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WORLD NEWS |
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Britain Considers Making
It Illegal to Pay for Sex
Anything more than dinner and a movie would be a felony. |
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HISTORY |
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New Nixon Tapes Reveal
Purge of All Photos of Other
Presidents from White House
Anyone caught with a picture of Martin
Van Buren was fired. |
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ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
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China Bans
Lip-Synching After
Olympics Debacle
Girl who sang (left) and
girl who lip-synched
(right) have been sent to
re-education camps. |
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U. S. NEWS |
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Bernanke: Current Crisis
Nothing Like Great Depression
Soup lines not as long, movies not as
good. |
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Bush Sorry About
Economy, Iraq
Also some regrets about global warming,
war crimes. |
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Unemployment Rate Hits 6.7%
According to recently laid off
statisticians. |
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REMINDER |
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The only thing we have to
fear is a lengthy depression and two
endless wars. |
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Economists Say Country's Been in Recession Since 2007
Didn't want to screw up election by telling public sooner. |
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Obama Says He'll Invite Artists,
Poets, Scientists to White House
Or at least remove them from terrorist list. |
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New Rule Permits Loaded,
Concealed Weapons in Some National Parks
Sites affected: Al Capone Wildlife Refuge,
Bonnie and Clyde Twin Peaks National
Monument, Jimmy The Weasel
Fratianno National Forest. |
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Bushes Buy Home in Dallas
At auction of foreclosed properties. |
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