| |
 CONGRESS
IN MAJOR FIGHT WITH WHITE HOUSE
OVER IRAQ
Shown (left to right): Senators
Feingold, Durbin, Boxer, Obama
leave contentious hearing on
Capitol Hill. |
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| |
| WORLD NEWS |
 |
U.S. Forces Will Pursue
“Gated
Communities” Strategy in Iraq
Residents must keep lawns mown, houses
painted a color acceptable to the
community board, and no gay couples. |
| |
| EDUCATION |
|
Naked Parties All the Rage at
Ivy League Schools
However, applicants showing up naked for
interview have been rejected. |
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| ALSO IN THE
NEWS ... |
|
 Robot Aircraft to Monitor
Canadian Border
Will watch for seniors returning
to U.S. with arthritis medicine. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
|
Bush Tries to Sell New Iraq Plan
To His Dogs
Mrs. Beasley doubts military
effectiveness, Barney questions absence
of any new diplomatic proposals. |
|
774,000 Homeless in U.S.
According to survey of households. |
| |
| REMINDER |
| |
It's
not you, it really is
hotter than at any time
in recorded history. |
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| |
|
American Family Gets Some
Good News
More filing for bankruptcy than divorce. |
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Bush Will No Longer Enter
Room to “Hail to the Chief”
Henceforth: “Thus Spake
Zarathustra.” |
| |
| MISCELLANEOUS |
|
Mysterious Odor Briefly Panics
New Yorkers
Later revealed as publicity stunt for new
movie, Mysterious Odor From Outer
Space. |
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