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BUSH, CRUZ, WALKER, FIORINA,
RUBIO APPEAR AT KOCH BROTHERS DONOR
RETREAT
Woo wealthy conservatives hooked up to
machines that siphon money from their bank accounts. |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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Iranian Clerics Sermonizing Against
Possible Return of McDonald’s
Amid angry cries of “Death to Ronald McDonald!” |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS ... |
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 Google Glass Returns, But Won't
Be Available to General Public
To qualify for a pair you must
demonstrate complete disregard
for others' privacy combined with
total absence of style. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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FBI: ISIS Now Greater Threat
Than Al Qaeda
Just moved ahead of them in the standings. |
|
NSA Says It Will Destroy All
Phone Data Collected From
Mass Surveillance
But keep a copy around, just in case. |
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| REMINDER |
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Never change lanes without signaling, if you're black. |
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Obama Visits Ethiopia Despite
Country's Dismal Record on
Human Rights
Has productive meetings, but only
after being forced to stand in one
position for eight hours while
attached to electrical wires. |
| |
| POLITICS |
|
Bloomberg: Trump Worth Less
Than One Third of What He Says
Drives a 2002 Sentra, buys day-old
bread, wears a cardboard belt. |
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