 |
JON STEWART VOTED MOST
TRUSTED MAN IN AMERICA
Ali G voted Most Trusted Man in Britain. |
|
|
| |
| WORLD NEWS |
 |
Assistant Secretary of State
Says U.S. Would Consider
Russia Joining NATO
To strengthen military alliance against
ah, against the threat from, ah..... |
|
U.S. Forces Swiss Bank to Reveal
Names of Clients
Swiss army ordered to grab
knives, await deployment. |
| |
| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
|
 Beer
Summit Yields Agreement on Race
But breaks down in bitter
acrimony when conversation turns
to sports. |
|
|
| U. S. NEWS |
|
Economy Slightly Less Worse
Than Expected
Translation: you can come in off the ledge,
but leave the window open. |
|
Senate Committee Joins House,
Votes to End Funding for
Abstinence-Only Program
Will instead fund program imported from
England that promotes daily sex. |
| |
| REMINDER |
| |
It's
time to declare victory
and go home. |
|
|
|
| |
|
Growing Unease on
Obama's Health Plan
Seniors fear they'll be rounded up and
shot. |
| |
| LAW |
|
Attorney General Still Undecided
About Prosecuting Bush Officials
May hold them in Guantanamo until he
makes up his mind. |
|
