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POLL: AMERICANS WANT
“CHANGE”
Others call for “something different.” |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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Report: Saddam Provided More Food
to Iraqis Than Current Regime
But no fries or shakes. |
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Venezuela Introduces New
Currency
The “hugo.” |
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| PICTURE OF THE WEEK |
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Last Pay Phone on Earth
It's in Maine, in case you need to use it. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Bush “Strongly” Supports Justice
Dept. Probe of CIA Tapes' Destruction
Authorizes “harsh interrogation”
of George Tenet. |
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New Laws Go Into Effect
In All 50 States
In 48 you may now be pulled over for no
reason and held for several weeks in a
windowless cell. |
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| REMINDER |
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Nobody loves an occupying military force. |
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Investigator to Determine if
Foxes
Involved in Missing Chicken Scandal
Will report directly to Department of
Foxes. |
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Oops: Bush Gave Out Wrong “800”
Number for Mortgage Crisis Help
Callers got Prayer of the Day Hotline. |
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| POLITICS |
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Big Wins for Obama, Huckabee in
Iowa Harbinger of Things to Come
In this nation of small farmers. |
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