Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – JULY 15 - 21, 2024
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TECHNOLOGY
New Breakthrough Technologies Transforming Search for Alien Life
Shown: advanced observatory will be able to read the headline on a newspaper 3 million light years away.
Russia: Bot Farms Replace
Troll Farms

AI “taking good jobs from humans,” says one laid off troll.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
Study: Night Owls Perform
Better Cognitively Than
Early Risers

Usually at their new job after getting fired for coming in late.
Following Supreme Court Ruling,
Sackler Family Threatened
With Tons of Lawsuits

They're in desperate competition with Donald Trump for lawyers.
 
EDUCATION
Study: 94% of AI-Written College Exams Go Undetected
So far, no chatbots have been expelled.
FEATURE
How much of recyclable plastic actually gets recycled?
   A )  More than 75%  
   B )  More than 60%  
   C )  More than 50%  
   D )  Less than 10%  
Hint: did you ever follow the garbage truck that collects recyclables?
 
POLL
Pew: 63% Say Both Trump and Biden “Embarrassing”
Wouldn't want to be seen in the same room with either one of them.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Trump Campaign Blitzes Milwaukee With Billboards
It's a city he lost, hates, and will never set foot in again once he leaves.

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