 |
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Many Seats
Going Unsold for Certain
Events
Synchronized Archery,
Rhythmic Weightlifting,
Beach Pinochle (shown)
have been tough sells. |
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TV: U.S. Coverage of Games
Will Not Include Games
NBC will instead air 1100 hours of
sentimental profiles of athletes. |
|
Greek Baseball Team Hires
Translator
Will help the two Greeks on the team
communicate with American teammates. |
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Sportswriters Covering
Games of One Mind
They all write the same story, simultaneously. |
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| MISCELLANEOUS |
|
Russian Scientists Discover
Wreck of Alien Spaceship in Siberia
Vodka found on board “still
good.” |
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| FEATURE |
WHAT
THEY WERE THINKING
Mickey Mouse, Donald
Duck, Michael Eisner,
Hollywood Walk of Fame,
Hollywood, California,
August 9, 2004.
Mickey Mouse (left):
“I remember thinking
it's a long time to
stand in one place,
especially in ninety-plus
heat. Believe me, when
Walt ran things we were
treated better. But I was
happy to see Donald
finally get his star,
even if it did come after
Goofy, Pluto, and
Minnie.”
Donald Duck (center):
“I had only one
thought: what took so
fuckin' long? I know
Walt was partial to the
rodent -- money talks.
But 70 years? I was also
surprised none of my
nephews showed up.”
Michael Eisner (right):
“I was thinking of
the budget for this
thing. If we went over an
hour the production crew
would have to get another
forty thousand dollars.
And whoever was in the
duck costume had a
serious case of
b.o.” |
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