| POLITICS |
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Sen. Thurmond
Backs Military Action
"Remember the
Maine!" he shouts,
then dozes off. |
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| SPORTS |
|
Baseball: At Least 7 New York
Mets Suspected of Using Marijuana
Their teammates say they're
"shocked" and
"dismayed" that they
didn't share any with them. |
|
First "Bookies
Night" a Success
Detroit promotion doubles Tigers'
normal attendance for meaningless game
with Devil Rays. |
| |
| ODDS AND ENDS |
|
New Auto Runs
On Nitrous Oxide
4-cylinder Honda
Hilarious part of
company's new line
of "happy"
cars. |
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|
|
Switzerland Will Finally Join
UN
Miss Switzerland now eligible for Miss
World contest. |
|
Screeners at Los Angeles
Airport Miss 40% of
Weapons in Security Test
But spot 90% of celebrities. |
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| EDUCATION |
|
6 Massachusetts Students Sue
Over High School Exit Exam
Claim keeping them in high school
violates
ban on cruel and unusual punishment. |
|
New School Year Begins Amidst
National Commitment to Excellence
No rich child left behind. |
| |
| ART |
 |
|
Michelangelo's
"David" Undergoes Penile
Enlargement
Much-needed restoration
aimed at boosting tourism
revenue. |
|
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| THIS WEEK IN HISTORY |
| |
Sept. 17, 1789: After a prolonged
struggle, our country's Founding Fathers
sign the Constitution of the United
States, assigning to Congress the sole
power to declare war. The document is now
primarily of historical interest. |
| |
| STAMPS |
 |
|
Postal
Service Unveils 37¢
Cesar Chavez Stamp
But acknowledges most farm
workers can't afford it. |
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