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LATEST SPORTS
ILLUSTRATED SWIMSUIT
EDITION TO BE THE LAST
Next year, no swimsuits,
says the editor. |
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WORLD NEWS |
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Bush Says He Won't
Invade North Korea
World's other 187 nations ask for similar
reassurances. |
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Vatican Admits Pope Carried
Out 3 Exorcisms
Most recent one, performed on Dick
Cheney, failed. |
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Hu is First in Line to
Succeed Zemin
China's Vice President will take over in 2003 unless
defeated by Chairman What, Secretary Why,
or General I Don't Know. |
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| 2002 OLYMPICS |
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OLYMPICS END
Peaceful international
relations resume. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Pentagon's New Office of
Strategic
Influence Will Mix Truth, Lies
Formula: Four parts lies to one part
truth. |
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Justice O'Connor
"Pressured" in
2000 Election Decision
Forced to vote for Bush by French skating
federation. |
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GAO Sues Cheney for
Task Force Records
"You'll never find me," taunts Cheney
in e-mail to Rep. Waxman. |
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REMINDER
You’ve already had your fifteen
minutes of fame. |
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Administration to Shift Responsibility
For Toxic Cleanup to Taxpayers
But only if they're still alive. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
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Court Voids FCC Limits on
Broadcasting Monopolies; More
Consolidation Planned
Consumer groups
object, but news conference
ignored by media. |
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