NEW PRODUCTS |
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Robot Child
Real children are nothing
but trouble, but Hey
Buddy from Wham-O makes
parenting a breeze. Asks
questions, laughs, giggles,
says over 200 darndest things.
Never talks back, sleeps on
command. $1,299 at Cyber City. |
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MISCELLANEOUS |
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Finland to Introduce Four-Day
Work Week, Six-Hour Days
And fifty-minute hours. |
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Record 6,000 Reports of
UFOs in 2019
Extraterrestrials can't seem to get
enough of us. |
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TECHNOLOGY |
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Automated
Restaurants Close in Bay Area,
Causing Layoffs
Robot cooks, robot servers, delivery
robots pounding the pavement
looking for work. |
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MEDIA |
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Facebook Will Continue to
Allow Lies in Political Ads
After impassioned lobbying by both
parties. |
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FACTOID |
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Drunk Shopping Accounts
For $39.4 Billion Each Year
Not including the booze. |
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RELIGION |
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Evangelicals See Trump as
Another King Cyrus
Never heard of the guy, but I like
him already, says Trump. |
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ODDS 'N' ENDS |
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Survey: 75% of Men Feel
More Confident With Facial Hair
Compared with only 2% of women. |
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Prince Harry,
Meghan Markle Announce Plan
to Step Back From
Royal Family, Live Abroad, Make
Own Living
Their dream: run a B&B in the Poconos. |
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