| PEOPLE |
 |
 Enquirer Owner
Granted Immunity, Talking to Prosecutors
They can ask him about anything, from
Bigfoot to Martians to Elvis. |
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Russian Spy's Lawyers Challenge
Evidence She Used Sex to Infiltrate NRA
Asked members, “Is that a pistol in your pocket
or are you just glad to see me?” |
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| BUSINESS |
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J. C. Penney Hires Shaquille
O'Neill to Promote “Big & Tall”
Clothing Line
Hires Danny DeVito to promote “Short and Fat” line. |
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Procter & Gamble Applies for
Trademarks on LOL, WTF,
Other Acronyms
Hoping to make trillions in lawsuits. |
|
 Qatari Royal
Family Selling One of Its Luxury Planes for
$640,000,000
With lavish bedroom suites, huge conference
rooms and other amenities it's drawn interest
from several Cabinet members. |
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| CONSUMER NEWS |
|
 Nabisco Takes
Animals Out of Cage on Box of Animal Crackers
Adds trophy hunters. |
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| SCIENCE |
|
Report: Oceans Will Have More
Plastic Than Fish by 2050
Unless we eat less fish. |
| |
 Asteroid Contains
$10 Quintillion Worth of Precious Metals
Enough to make everyone on Earth wealthy
beyond their wildest dreams. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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New Study: Any Amount of
Alcohol Consumption
Dangerous to Your Health
Study funded by Ladies Temperance League,
Party Poopers Anonymous. |
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| ENVIRONMENT |
|
Study: Entering Period of
“Extreme Extremes” With
Hotter Heatwaves, Wetter Floods
And longer lines to get into air conditioned theaters. |
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