| TECHNOLOGY |
 |
 |
|
Robotic Cat Provides Low-
Maintenance Companionship
Also available: robotic grandfather (rear). |
| |
| SPORTS |
|
Fantasy Sports Betting Study: 91%
of Winnings Won by 1.3% of Players
The same 1.3% who call it a game of skill. |
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| KIDZ KORNER |
| |
| Pin the
Putdown on the Candidate |
| Insulting
his GOP rivals seems to be working for
Donald Trump. Try to match his disparaging
remarks with their intended targets. |
| A. |
Jeb Bush |
1. |
Look at that face! |
| B. |
Marco Rubio |
2. |
A complete & total dud! |
| C. |
Lindsey Graham |
3. |
An okay doctor. |
| D. |
Carly Fiorina |
4. |
Low energy! |
| E. |
Ben Carson |
5. |
A total lightweight! |
| F. |
John Kasich |
6. |
What a stiff! |
| ANSWERS: A-4, B-5, C-6, D-1, E-3, F-2 |
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| NEW PRODUCTS |
|
 It's the World's
First Smartphone Vibrator!
When no one's sexting you or sending you
naked pictures of themselves, you can
always attach one of these to your phone
and pleasure yourself while waiting for that
next sext. $39.95, at Onan of Hollywood. |
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| |
| RELIGION |
|
 Starbucks Under Fire From
Christian Groups for Design
of Its Holiday Coffee Cup
Claim it looks like “Virgin Mary on acid.” |
|
| |
| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
|
 Vietnamese Man Named Phuc
Dat Bich Angry He Keeps
Getting Kicked Off Facebook
And can't understand why he has
over forty million followers on Twitter. |
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