Ironic Times

page one
PAGE THREE – NOVEMBER 24 - 30, 2014
page two

MISCELLANEOUS
Polish Town Rejects Naming Playground After Winnie the Pooh Because of Bear's Undefined Gender, Lack of Pants
And “not because Pooh Park sounds unsanitary.”
 
TECHNOLOGY
Researchers Have Already
Developed 3D Pizzas,
Hamburgers, Ravioli, Chocolate

But so far everything tastes like marzipan.
Breakthrough: Software Capable
Of Recognizing, Describing
Content of Pictures

First step in building humanoid capable of compiling a family photo album.
 
SPORTS
Qatar, Tiny Country With Inhospitable Climate That's Already Hosting 2022 World Cup, Awarded 2019 World Track and Field Championships
Puts world track and field officials in same lofty tax bracket as World Cup officials.
 
KIDZ KORNER
Vocabulary Builders
guest worker program - a policy option popular with Republicans, it works on a national level similar to how you'd invite guests into your home for dinner, which they would cook for you, you would eat it, then they do the dishes, clean up the kitchen, and go back home.
FEATURE
Republicans are debating how to respond to Obama’s Executive Action on Immigration. As of today, the leading option is:
A )Have meeting of Congressional caucus where differences can be settled by fisticuffs.
B )Work out reasonable compromise plan, start negotiating with Democrats.
C )Pass bipartisan bill already passed by the Senate.
D )Stall, bluster, pontificate, grandstand, whine, and run out the clock.
Hint: also bloviate, sound off, rant, rage, bully, and harangue.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Spate of Loch Ness Monster
Sightings Blamed on Fallen
Tree Branch

And some very strong whiskey.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
 ©  Copyright 2014 Ironic Times