| PEOPLE |
 |
 Romney
Rejoins Board at Marriott
He'll help them pare their workforce. |
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86-Year-Old Hugh Hefner Getting
Married to 26-Year-Old
When he's 100 she'll be forty, at which point
he may start looking for someone younger. |
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| MEDIA |
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Fox Drops Karl Rove, Dick Morris
They're immediately signed by Satan News Service. |
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| BUSINESS |
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Apple Says It Will Make Some of
Its Products in U.S.
And move thousands of Chinese workers here. |
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WalMart Deemed Safety
Improvements to Bangladeshi
Factory “Not Financially Feasible”
Deemed financially feasible: insurance
to cover material losses in case factory
catches fire and kills 112 workers who
can't escape due to lack of safety
improvements. |
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| SCIENCE |
|
Our Universe May be Just One of
Infinite Number of Universes
If so, all contracts stipulating “throughout
known universe in perpetuity” would have
to be renegotiated. |
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Icebergs Scoured Florida
During Ice Age
Say some long-time residents. |
| |
 Voyager
Probe Encounters Unexpected Magnetic Highway
at Edge of Solar System
Where Planet Earth is just an obscure roadside attraction. |
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| TECHNOLOGY |
|
North Korea Says it Plans Launch of Satellite
Into Low Earth Orbit
Last one ended up in extremely low earth
orbit, underwater. |
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New Technology Will Project
Data Onto a Contact Lens
Allowing you to stare into the eyes of your
dinner companion while reading a suggestive
text message from someone at another table. |
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