Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – JANUARY 18 - 24, 2010
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SCIENCE
Find: Neanderthal Men Wore Makeup
Took forever to get ready.
Y Chromosome Most Rapidly
Evolving in Humans

Soon, men may ask for directions.
Egypt's Pyramids Not Built by
Slaves, Says New Research

Built by guys pharaoh picked up outside local rock foundry.
Find Suggests Old Testament Written 300 Years Earlier Than Thought
Panned by critics when released, all-time best-seller slowly developed “cult” following.
 
SPORTS
Mark McGwire Admits Using Steroids
Had to take them just to admit it.
FEATURE
What is a Cadillac Health Plan?
A )a plan which costs more but has better benefits.
B )a plan which costs the same but has better benefits.
C )a plan which has the same benefits but costs more.
Hint: it's not for people who live in their Cadillac.
 
RELIGION
Vatican Not Pleased About “Avatar”
“It's no Exorcist,” says Pope.
 
ART
Italian Doctor: “Mona Lisa” Smile Due to High Cholesterol
Infrared analysis reveals half-eaten cannoli in lower right corner.

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