| MISCELLANEOUS |
 |
Postal Service Announces Set of
TV-Themed Stamps for 2009 |
| |
 |
| |
Note: collecting stamps and
watching TV are hobbies enjoyed
by Americans of an earlier era. |
|
English to Reach 1 Million
Words by April
Predicted one millionth word:
millionomania, n. the state of being
obsessed with the one millionth of
anything. |
| |
| SPORTS |
|
NFL: Eighteen Coaches Fired
Other twelve reach playoffs. |
|
Hot Stove League: Only Journeymen,
Wack Jobs Still Available
Bench-sitters, head cases already signed. |
|
World Chess Championship Begins
Shown: live webcam coverage of match. |
|
 |
|
|
| FEATURE |
 |
| Obama takes office
facing: |
| A ) | two wars,
economic meltdown. |
| B ) | three wars
counting Gaza, economic
collapse. |
| C ) | four wars
counting Pakistan, economic Armageddon. |
| Hint: is
that a cloud, or a
seven-headed fire
breathing dragon
descending from the sky? |
|
|
|
| |
| TECHNOLOGY |
|
New iPhone App Makes
Fake Calls to You
Another app answers fake calls. |
| |
| NEW PRODUCTS |
 |
 |
WinePod, World's
First Home Winery Hits Stores
Not shown: MoonShinePod, world's first
home distillery. |
|
|
