PEOPLE |
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Rumsfeld
Shopping Autobiography to
Lukewarm Publishers
Book covers every major event in
his life up to but not including
Iraq. |
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ENTERTAINMENT |
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CBS Settles With Imus
He'll replace Katie Couric on evening
news. |
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If He Runs, NBC Won't Air
Law and Order Episodes
Featuring Fred Thompson
ABC already stopped airing episodes of
So You Think You Can Dance
featuring Dennis Kucinich. |
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BUSINESS |
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Markets Make Slight Correction
Price of stocks too high, apples too low. |
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KFC Opens 6000th U.S. Location
In Roswell, New Mexico. |
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SCIENCE |
|
Pair of German Physicists
Claim to Have Broken Speed of Light
Now they're nowhere to be found. |
|
Scientists Discover Reason
for Contagious Yawning
Soccer. |
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HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
Modern Living Blamed for
Sharp Rise in Cancer
Follows sharp drop in being
devoured by predators. |
|
Poll: 94% of Americans Say
They're Happy
Same percentage say they're on
tranquilizers. |
|
Government Says Avandia
Should Stay on the Market
To lower risk of heart attack for GlaxoSmithKline
officers, stockholders. |
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CORRECTION |
|
In our
story on the recent survey of
daily newspapers' published
corrections, we said that 98% of
all errors were corrected, when in fact 98% of all
errors went uncorrected. We
apologize for any confusion. |
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