PEOPLE |
|
Alleged 9/11
Mastermind Confesses at
Secret Gitmo Hearing
According to transcript
he says, I'm drowning! I did it! I'm
drowning! I did it! I'm drowning! I did it! |
|
|
Jacques
Chirac Bows Out of
Presidential Race in France
Senses better opportunity in U.
S. Republican primaries. |
|
|
BUSINESS |
|
Study: Americans Lose
$3 Billion in Productivity
During NCAA Tournament
At present pace, U.S. will be Third World
country by 2020. |
|
Current Time Channel and Correct
Time Network to Merge
Move faces tough scrutiny from
regulators. |
|
Halliburton Moves Headquarters
To Dubai
For the weather. |
|
TRAVEL |
|
Japanese-Style
Tube Hotel
Coming to Las Vegas
Will cater to losers. |
|
|
|
|
HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
Court Rules Dying Who Use
Medical Marijuana Can Be Arrested
And have their morphine cut off. |
|
CDC: Americans Still Not Eating
Their Vegetables
Recommendation: go to our rooms, no dessert. |
|
SCIENCE |
|
Study: Rats Think Like Humans
They lie, cheat, eat too much cheese. |
|
Report:
This Has Been Warmest
Winter Ever
Based on following
complicated formula:
|
|
|
|
|
Scientists Rule Out Traveling
Back Through Time
Most cite cost. |
|
KIDZ KORNER |
Vocabulary
Builders
gaming n.
a form of play for adults
which makes them feel
like children again, but
is age-appropriate, as
in, ~ is not
addictive, like gambling,
it's good, wholesome
fun for grownups. |
|
|
|