| WEATHER |
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Las Vegas
Gets 3 Inches of Snow
Hell freezes over. |
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| ENTERTAINMENT |
|
Reality TV Show Stars Young
Execs Competing for Job with Donald Trump
Loser must take the job. |
|
Ancient Greek Verses by
Menander, "Father of Sitcom,"
Discovered in Rome
Tell story of Athenian philosopher with
wife, five kids, and wisecracking
neighbor. |
| |
| BUSINESS |
|
Interstate Bakeries to Close
Plants, Lay Off Workers, Automate
Some fear Wonder Bread, Twinkies may
lose fresh-baked, homemade quality
America loves. |
|
Dog Soft
Drink Market Heats Up
Analysts predict $10
billion industry by 2010. |
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| SCIENCE |
|
Saturn Closest to Earth in 30
Years
You'll be able to see someone
undressing on Saturn with your naked eye. |
|
Texas A&M Scientists
Clone Deer
Experiment financed by grant from NRA. |
|
 Vinland Map,
Proving Norsemen Visited
America Before Columbus,
Deemed Authentic
Also authenticated: receipts from
several motels in Nova Scotia. |
|
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YOGA
EXERCISE OF THE WEEK
 Assume your favorite yoga
position, take ten, deep,
cleansing breaths, and
while keeping your blood
pressure at a constant,
steady, low reading,
consider the prospect of
four more years of being
stuck in Iraq, as huge
energy, pharmaceutical,
mining, logging,
financial and insurance
interests line their
pockets with your tax
dollars.
If you can do that, you
will be reincarnated as a
beam of pure light. |
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