PEOPLE |
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QUEEN ELIZABETH
ARRESTED IN INTERNATIONAL
DRUG STING
"I
told you so," says
Lyndon Larouche. |
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Clinton Plans Presidential
Library/Bordello in Little Rock
Would provide documents for scholars,
pay for itself. |
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BUSINESS |
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Pets.com Folds, Then
Loses Sock Puppet
Mascot could be stuck to flannel
shirt. |
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Cosmopolitan, Redbook Go Out of
Business; No More Sex Secrets Left
Last 3 techniques which drive
men wild revealed in latest issues. |
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INTERNET |
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Voting Online Gets First True Test
President-elect Cindy Margolis calls
it a smashing success. |
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Computer Hackers Break
Into 7-Eleven
Caught stealing two grape Big Gulps. |
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SCIENCE |
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Clones Are Identical, But Not
Clones of Clones, Say Researchers
Clones of clones are rebellious,
defiant, resentful of any association
with clones. |
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ENVIRONMENT |
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Animal Crackers Will
Discontinue Endangered Species
Rhinos and gorillas to be replaced by
coyotes, pigeons. |
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SPACE
Object,
Size of Large Sleigh, on
Collision Course with
Earth
Should burn up in
atmosphere Dec. 25. |
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HIGH TECH |
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Porno Palm Pilot Hot Gift for
Dad
Stores thousands of images, can be
operated with one hand. |
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Bad News: Gophers Like Optic Fiber
Good news: gophers will pay extra for
broadband services. |
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MISCELLANEOUS |
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America Now 75% Rural
Most of us are farmers. |
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