PEOPLE |
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Book: Trump
Clogged White House Toilets
With Documents
Ordered daily intelligence briefings
printed on softer paper. |
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BUSINESS |
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Increased Use of VR Headsets Blamed
for Spike in Household Damage Claims
Frightening fire-breathing dragons turn out
to be that chandelier you got at IKEA. |
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Canadian Truck
Convoy Protest Blocks Border Crossing
Cuts off supply of Canadian imports like
maple syrup, Canadian bacon, comedy writers. |
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HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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Study: Lifting Weights for
Just 3 Seconds a Day Can
Improve Muscle Strength
Try using a grocery sack filled with
several gallons of ice cream. |
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SCIENCE |
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$10B James Webb
Telescope Sends Back First Image
General reaction: back to the drawing board. |
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France: Modern
Humans Moved Into Cave One
Year After Neanderthals Abandoned It
History's earliest known case of gentrification. |
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NASA: Mars
Rover Image of Reclining Alien
Figure Actually Just a Rock
But who put it there remains a mystery. |
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Researchers Observe Chimps
Performing First Aid on
Themselves and Each Other
While other chimps spread misinformation. |
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