Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JANUARY 20 - 26, 2020
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PEOPLE
Japanese Billionaire Seeking “Special Woman” to Accompany
Him on Flight Around Moon
“A sport, a goer, wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more, he adds knowingly.”
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Hollywood: Rampant Speculation About What Harry, Meghan Will Do to Make a Living
Some predict a reality series (“Keeping Up With the Windsors”), or a sitcom (“Royal Pains”) or, if no new offers appear, perhaps she'll return to opening briefcases on “Deal or No Deal”.
 
BUSINESS
Report: Trump Tax Cut
Created $32 Billion Windfall
For America's Top Banks

And yet, they still don't open until 10.
Gwyneth Paltrow's Candle Called “This Smells Like My Vagina” Sells Out
It's the most popular of her products that smell like her vagina.
SCIENCE
Strange Particles Found in
Antarctica Cannot Be
Explained by Physics

So physicists turn to astrology.
Scientists Discover Oldest
Material Known to Exist on
Earth, 7.5 Billion Years Old

Nobody, ever, in all those years, thought to pick it up and throw it out.
 
Breakthrough: Scientists Use Stem Cells From Frogs to Build Tiny Living Robots
A full-sized robot frog still years away.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Average Adult Will Try 126
Different Diets During Their Lifetime

Before realizing eating less does the trick.
Study: Regular Cardio Exercises Strengthen Brain Health, Slow Cognitive Decline
And who knows, you could get lucky.

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