POLITICS |
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Urban Outfitters
Selling Hillary Nutcrackers
Basically conceding the election to her. |
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MISCELLANEOUS |
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Ku Klux Klan Chapter Opens its Doors to
Hispanics, Blacks, Jews, Gays
And to all people who hate them. |
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TECHNOLOGY |
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Revealed: Chinese Hacked Into U.S.
Weather Systems in October
Explains all that smog, and Al Roker's
foreign accent. |
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RELIGION |
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New Theory: Jesus Was
Married, Had Children
And a dog. |
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SPORTS |
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World Cup Scandal Report Accuses Top
FIFA Officials of Massive Corruption
Or, in FIFA officials' summation of
report, clears them of any wrongdoing. |
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Australia is hosting the G-20 Summit,
but Australians are intensely
embarrassed about it because: |
A ) | Their premier, Tony
Abbott, only opens his mouth to change feet. |
B ) | Australia is so far
away from everywhere else that other countries tend to forget
it's there. |
C ) | "Throw another
shrimp on the barbie, Mate!" |
D ) | The most famous
Australians are Kanga and Roo. |
Hint: And they didn't even live in Australia. |
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ODDS 'N' ENDS |
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Latest Guinness
World Records Announced |
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Shown (l to r): world's shortest, tallest, biggest. |
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