| PEOPLE |
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New Yorker
Insinuates Bert and Ernie Are Gay
“News to me,” says Elmo. |
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| ENTERTAINMENT |
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Samsung Begins Selling 55-Inch OLED TVs
That Can Be Viewed Equally Well From Any
Angle
And still, there's nothing good on. |
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| BUSINESS |
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California Going After Life Insurance
Companies for Not Notifying Beneficiaries
That They Can Collect, Not Paying Them,
Continuing to Charge Deceased Monthly
Premiums Until All the Money is Gone
State also reconsidering cancellation of
Ethics classes in Business Schools. |
|
 Taco Bell to Market
Some “Taco Meat Fillings” as
“Protein”
On advice of their lawyers. |
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| TECHNOLOGY |
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UK Study: Internet Access as
Important to Men as Sex
Most men looking for a woman with Wi-Fi. |
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Warning in iTunes Agreement Prohibits Using
Product to Make Nuclear Weapons
Or more than five copies of Justin Bieber. |
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| SCIENCE |
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Research: Helicopter Can Be Controlled by Thought
Employs techniques, technology patented by Association of
Super Villains. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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Study: Fracking Linked to Water
Contaminated With Methane
Best not to drink tap water and smoke until
problem fixed. |
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| ENVIRONMENT |
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At Idled San Onofre Nuke Plant Scheduled for
Permanent Closure, Layoffs Begin
Including Homer Simpson. |
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