Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JULY 5 - 11, 2010
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PEOPLE
 
Ahmadinejad Says He'll Ban Coca-Cola
Reveals secret program to develop Ayatollah-Cola.
 
TRAVEL
Maggots Falling From Overhead Bin Force US Airways Flight Back to Gate
To collect $10 maggot fee from passengers.
 
BUSINESS
Wall Street Reform Bill
Nears Completion

Just a few hundred more pages of exemptions and loopholes to be added before vote.
G-20 Leaders Greeted Warmly in Canada
Thousands show their support for spending less on poor, hungry.
SCIENCE
NASA: No Sex Permitted on International Space Station
No making out, no French kissing.
Aliens Impressed by Latest Crop Circles
Extraterrestrial art critics call them “fresh, contemporary.”
Crew Picked for Simulated
Mission to Neptune
 
  Six men (above) will live in isolation for 14 years to test feasibility of such a mission.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Effects of Mom's Favoritism May Last Far Into Adulthood
According to Smothers Foundation.
Study: Money Can Buy Happiness
But only if you act now.

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