| PEOPLE |
 |
 Rev. Jesse
Jackson Denies Using N-Word
During Break on Fox News Show
Claims he was in Hymie Town balling
some spic bitch. |
|
| |
| ADVERTISING |
|
Airlines Begin Selling
Ads on Boarding Passes
Advertisers hope to profit from
increasingly positive feelings about air
travel. |
| |
| BUSINESS |
|
Freddie Mac CEO Made
$20 Million Last Year
About a nickel a mistake. |
|
American Airlines to Cut 200
Pilots
Baggage handlers will fill in. |
|
 Congressman Wants All
American Flags Made in America
By undocumented seamstresses. |
|
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| SCIENCE |
|
Study: Babies Think Like
Adults
And vice versa. |
|
Loud Bar Music Makes You
Drink More
Your Honor. |
| |
 Gulf
“Dead Zone”
Will Soon Be Size of New Jersey
With similar chemical
composition. |
|
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| |
| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
Bad News: 1/4 of Americans
Obese
Good news: they can't afford to buy food. |
|
Dept. of Health Human
Services Directive Defines Contraception
as Abortion
And onanism as mass murder. |
| |
| CORRECTION |
| |
| Our
headline, “1 Million Now on
Terror Watch List” was
misleading, due to aliases
included on the list. The actual
number of people the government
is actively watching is only
400,000. We apologize for the
mistake. |
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