| PEOPLE |
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| |
Polygamist Jeffs Moved to Utah
To Face Charges
Meanwhile, in Beverly Hills, Hugh Hefner
(right) celebrates his half-birthday. |
|
DeLay Says He Has Publishing Deal
For His Autobiography
However, it may be promoted as a crime
novel. |
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| ENTERTAINMENT |
|
 Hezbollah
Sponsoring Boy Band
Shown: group performs at
last year's
Martyrdom Video Awards. |
|
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Metropolitan Opera to Pipe
Broadcasts Into Movie Theaters
Refunds will be offered those expecting
to see Jackass 2. |
| |
| TRAVEL |
|
 Airbus
Superjumbo Makes Test
Flight With 474
Passengers Aboard
Aircraft performs well;
419 bags lost. |
|
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
|
Ice Bubbles Reveal Biggest
Rise in CO2 Levels in 800,000 Years
But most of it happened before God
created the Heavens and the Earth. |
|
Study Questions Skills of
Aging Surgeons
Signs you may want another doctor to
perform your bypass: |
| |
| |
1. |
Whistles "As
Time Goes By" in examining
room. |
| |
2. |
Grumbles,
"Now where'd I put the
damn scalpel?" |
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3. |
Has to hold your
chart at arm's length. |
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4. |
Copies of 1938
"Boys' Life" in waiting
room. |
| |
5. |
"Ooops!" |
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| |
| SCIENCE |
|
British Patient in Vegetative
State May or May Not Have Some Awareness
To be on safe side, don't eat
broccoli. |
| |
| CORRECTION |
| |
| We reported
that President Bush had referred
to busting the Miami terrorist
plot as a great success. In fact,
FBI informants provided the
money, video cameras, plans,
warehouse, cellphones, targets, a
van and the Al Queda
"swearing in"
ceremonies, while the captured
terrorists provided only the
marijuana, so Bush must have been
referring to the great success of
busting some other terrorist
plot. We apologize for any
confusion caused by our mistake. |
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