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MANY FEDERAL
WORKERS STAY HOME AS
NATION'S CAPITAL HIT BY
STORMS, FLOODING
Stalls vital work dismantling regulations,
undermining laws, purging homosexuals. |
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WORLD NEWS |
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Nuclear Proliferation Issue
Poses
Dilemma for Bush
Doesn't know who to nuke first. |
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Bin Laden Releases Video
Praising Zarqawi
He did a heckuva job, says Al
Qaeda's leader. |
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TECHNOLOGY |
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Exploding Laptop Incident
Being
Investigated by Dell
Computer maker warns users not to press
Ctrl-Alt-Delete until further notice. |
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ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
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Bush, Koizumi
Visit Graceland
Japanese Prime Minister
places wreath on toilet
where Elvis died. |
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U. S. NEWS |
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Mastermind Behind Sears Tower
Terror Plot Identified
Was the FBI informant. |
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War Forcing Army Equipment
Prices to Triple
Hammers that once cost $1000, now cost
$3000. |
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House Votes to Lift Ban on
Offshore Drilling
Cites need for more greenhouse gases in
atmosphere. |
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THE WAR |
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Bush Plan for Iraq Keeps
Enemy
Confused, Off Balance |
MONDAYS:
Withdraw troops by end of
2007, starting with big
drawdown this September. |
TUESDAYS:
Cancel withdrawal plans,
whoever said that is
crazy. |
WEDNESDAYS:
Big U.S. military
operation to crush
insurgency in restive
provinces. |
THURSDAYS:
Let Iraqis crush
insurgency. |
FRIDAYS:
Amnesty for terrorists,
if that's what
Maliki wants. |
SATURDAYS:
No amnesty for
terrorists, no matter
what that idiot Maliki
wants. |
SUNDAYS:
Change subject, attack
press, accuse Democrats
of having no plan for
Iraq. |
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