Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – APRIL 28 - MAY 4, 2003
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ENTERTAINMENT
  Production Begins On 46th
Godzilla Movie

Godzilla Vs. The 50-Foot Special Effects Man will be in theaters this summer.
TV: O.J. Simpson Reality
Show in the Works

He’ll play a “lovable ex-football star who murdered his wife.”
Ted Turner Calls Rupert
Murdoch a "Warmonger"

Turner detained by Fox Security Forces.
TV: Couric, Leno to Switch Jobs for One Day
He’ll do serious interview of Elizabeth Dole on “Today,” she’ll trade quips with acerbic funnyman Bob Dole on “The Tonight Show.”
BUSINESS
Supersonic Concorde to End Service
Demand for slower, less comfortable air travel doomed business.
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: New Yorkers Live Longer
Than Other Americans

Based on total number of New York minutes.
Study: Babes as Susceptible to
Heart Disease as Men

Blame years of medical establishment not taking health of sex objects seriously.
 
SCIENCE
Study: Sex Lives Of Worms Near Chernobyl Vastly Improved Since Disaster
Nuclear power industry spokesman calls findings “a positive.”
 
PUBLISHING
Top 5 Non-Fiction Best Sellers
1.  Liberals Are Lying Scum Bastards
2.  Liberals Eat Their Young
3.  The I Hate Liberals Cookbook
4.  More Liberals Are Lying Scum Bastards
5.  Conspiracy: Why Only Liberals Get Published

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