MISCELLANEOUS |
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Economy Doing
Great, Says Greenspan
But admits that he,
personally, uses a barter
system. |
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ENVIRONMENT |
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2002 2nd Hottest Year Since
1860
But hottest year ever for DVD sales. |
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SPORTS |
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Baseball: Winter Meetings
Produce Numerous Trades
Teams swap overpriced underachievers for
expensive dead wood. |
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NBA: Officials Heavily
Criticized for Increased Number of Bad
Calls
Some blame new system of paying refs by
the foul, rather than bi-weekly. |
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ODDS 'N ENDS |
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Hefner Files
Missing Blondes Report
Three of his seven
girlfriends unaccounted
for. |
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(Last week we gathered together a
distinguished panel of psychics
and asked them for their
predictions for 2003.) |
Kandu (India):
"President George Bush will
accidentally get a Mohawk haircut." |
Madame Blavinsky
(Switzerland): "Saddam Hussein
will change his name to Sam
Hirschman." |
Cassandra
(Canada): "Extraterrestrials
will land in New York City, go to
the United Nations, the Statue of
Liberty, Rockefeller Center, and
then leave." |
The Oracle
(Delphi): "The stock market
will go up and down and up and
down and up and down and then,
that's it, I'll be
getting out of the market, my
nerves can't take it." |
Deep Fritz
(computer): "A robot will win
the Pillsbury Bake-Off." |
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