Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE - JANUARY 21 -27, 2002
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BUSINESS
Enron Bankruptcy Hurts Houston in Other Ways
Company owns city's finest work of art (right).
Disney to Pay $90,000 for Destroying Documents in Winnie the Pooh Case
"It was 11 o'clock," says a spokesman, "time for a little shredding."
 
PEOPLE
Bob Barker Named National Spokesman
He's the new face of Viagra.
 
PUBLISHING
Talk Folds
Tina Brown's superficial, insubstantial, pseudo-intellectual, celebrity-driven monthly never caught on.
 
INTERNET
Enron Stock Certificates Attracting Big Bucks on Ebay
Mementos of collapse could end up saving company.
Web Suffix .Name Now Available
Coming soon: .age, .weight.
 
SPORTS
Britney Spears to Highlight NBA's "Read to Achieve" Program
League promoting family reading on nights when no NBA games are broadcast.
SPECIAL FEATURE 
WHAT TO DO ABOUT THE HOMELESS
Solution        Advantages    Disadvantages   
  Look the other way Clean, swift, efficient Could trip over them, injure self
  Blame the homeless Requires no further action Hard to apply to children
  Compassionate speeches Sounds good Doesn't actually help
  Spend money Might help Costs money

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