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SHOPPERS SPEND BILLIONS
ON BLACK FRIDAY
Much of it on medical care. |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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UN Environmental Envoy Quits
After Audit Finds $500,000
Spent on Travel, Mostly to Paris
Researching environment in expensive French restaurants. |
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Guatemala Sentences Former Soldier
to 5,160 Years for Village Massacre
Less the eight months he's already served. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS ... |
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 Statue of Liberty's
Original Torch Being Moved
To a nicer country. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Before Christmas Mueller
Expected to Start Handing
Down Indictments
Based on who's been naughty, who's been nice. |
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Trump Administration Releases
Dire Climate Report
Lengthy document flown to desert island,
lit on fire, ashes placed in watertight
urn, dropped in ocean. |
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| REMINDER |
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Keep your friends close and lock up your enemies. |
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Study: Most Americans Suffer
From Strong Feelings of
Loneliness, Lack of Significance
in their Relationships
And blame it all on illegal immigrants. |
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| FACTOID |
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Census Bureau: Whites Will
Make Up Less Than 50% of
Population in 2044
But more then 90% of CEOs, Senators, recreational
space travelers. |
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