Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – OCTOBER 8 - 14, 2018
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PEOPLE
Trump: Sexual Assault Protesters “Paid Professionals”
They get $50, same as what he paid people to attend his first campaign speech.
Donald Trump Jr: #MeToo
Makes Me Fear More for
My Sons Than My Girls

And more for my father than my sons.
 
BUSINESS
Jeff Bezos, Worth $163 Billion,
Raises Amazon's Minimum
Wage to $15 an Hour

At 40 hours a week, you'll have as much as Jeff Bezos in just 6,520,000 years.
Coca-Cola Developing Drink
Using Marijuana

Smoke-A-Cola will be test-marketed in San Diego.
More Stores Announce They'll Close on Thanksgiving
Shoppers encouraged to camp outside that day for Black Friday sales.
SCIENCE
Astronomer Warns: If Particle
Accelerator Experiment Goes
Wrong, Resulting Black Hole
Will Shrink Earth to Tiny
Sphere Just 330 Feet Across

And interest rates will go through the roof.
Female Nobel Prize Winner In Physics Deemed “Not Important Enough” For Wikipedia Entry
Site moderator explains she will “certainly” be included, “if she wins another.”
 
Dwarf Planet "The Goblin" Discovered in Strange Elliptical Orbit, Hinting at Massive Unseen Planet
“You can't make this stuff up,” says one astronomer.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: Vitamin D Supplements Largely Worthless
They've been shown to be of value as placebos.

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