Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – OCT 27 - NOV 2, 2008
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PEOPLE
England: Queen Entertains Members of Loony Party
Later met with members of Monster Raving Loony Party.
Palin’s New Campaign Clothes From
Saks Fifth Avenue, Neiman Marcus

Located in anti-American part of America.
 
BUSINESS
Market Continues Plunge on Disappointing Profit Reports
And fall of capitalism.
Stocks Lose $16.1 Trillion in Value Since Sept. 1
Though $16.1 trillion isn't what it used to be.
Money Woes Hit Art Market
Buyers beginning to consider artwork's value as scrap.
Greenspan “Shocked” by Economic Collapse
Thought greed was good
SCIENCE
NASA Adding Onboard Computer Therapist to Future Space Missions
Replaces inflatable dolls, which were deemed “unreliable.”
Study: Our Kids Less Likely to Graduate or Earn as Much as We Did
Their kids less likely to walk upright, use tools.
 
Britain Releases Secret UFO Files
In language no one recognizes.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: Half of U.S. Doctors Give Patients Placebos
Ask your doctor if placebos are right for you.
Government: Adults Should Get 2˝ Hours of Exercise Per Week
Might as well, they’re not working.
Tests on Mice Prove It's Possible to Selectively Erase Memories
Someday you'll be able to take a pill that makes you forget you took it.

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