| MISCELLANEOUS |
 |
 |
World's
Tallest Man, World's
Shortest Man Meet
Find they have nothing in
common. |
|
| |
| POLITICS |
 |
Analysis: White Women Voting
for Clinton, Black Men for Obama
White men, black women “sitting this
one out.” |
|
Survey: Public Fed Up With
Hearing Candidates Debate Important
Issues
Wants them to exchange nasty, personal
attacks. |
| |
| SPORTS |
|
World's Top Marathoner Won't
Run in Olympics Because of Smog
Fears he won't see finish line. |
|
More Ballparks Adding
“All You Can Eat” Sections
In addition to limitless food, each fan
receives a copy of The Decline and
Fall of the Roman Empire. |
|
| FEATURE |
 |
| The most surprising news
event of last week was: |
| A ) | Big
banks get huge bailout. |
| B ) | President
intervenes to weaken anti-smog rules. |
| C ) | Governor
caught with expensive prostitute. |
| Hint: if you
answered any of the
above, you have a low
surprise threshold. |
|
|
|
| |
| RELIGION |
|
Vatican Lists
“Polluting” Among Modern Sins
Unless it's offset by carbon credits. |
| |
| POLL |
|
Most Believe They're Not Better Off
Now Than Four Years Ago
Some say they're not better off now
than four hundred years ago. |
|
