| PEOPLE |
 |
 |
Bush Solves
Rubik's Cube
Takes him two weeks. |
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| |
| ENTERTAINMENT |
|
Writers Strike Turns Ugly
Shown: picketers outside Warner Bros.
restrained by security guards. |
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 |
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| |
| BUSINESS |
|
Romney's Business Bought
Others, Sucked Them Dry, Busted Unions, Used Profits To
Buy Other Companies, Suck Them Dry
Makes him well-prepared for foreign policy. |
|
Talking Jesus Action Figure Recalled
Talks too much about the poor. |
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 |
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| HEALTH/MEDICINE |
|
Study: Standing Up as
Important as Exercise
Sitting around as deadly as smoking. |
| |
| SCIENCE |
|
Study: Humans Evolved 100
Times
Faster After Introduction of
Agriculture 40,000 Years Ago
Then stopped after introduction of TV. |
|
Chimp Beats Students at
Memory Test
Later, students dissect chimp's brain to
find out why. |
| |
 Korean
Scientists
Successfully
Clone Glow-in-
the-Dark Cats
Now world will never run
out of them. |
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| EDUCATION |
|
Harvard Boosts Financial Aid
to All
But the Richest of the Rich
Including rich nitwits whose
dads went there. |
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