Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – NOVEMBER 6 - 12, 2006
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PEOPLE
Courtney: Mel Helped Me Get Sober
And dump the Kabbalah.
Hef Says He's Playing Dominoes Instead of Having Sex
Shown: Miss December
 
MEDIA
Only 56% of ’05 Journalism
Grads Say They’d Read
Newspaper “Yesterday”

And even fewer plan to read newspaper “tomorrow.”
 
BUSINESS
U.S. Drops Claim That Chevron
Owes Millions in Underpaid
Royalties for Gas

Whole darned thing was just colossal misunderstanding, government now says.
First Air- Powered Vehicle Unveiled
To gasps.
HEALTH / MEDICINE
New Dietary Guidelines Released
Eat a pound of chocolate, wash it down with eight cups of coffee and thirty gallons of red wine daily.
 
New York Makes First Trans Fat Arrest
Man caught trying to bring French fries (shown) into city from New Jersey.
 
POLITICS
Soaring Stock Market Helps
GOP Candidates

Appeals to their billionaire base.
 
CORRECTION
We reported that the American Chamber of Commerce in Shanghai, including UPS, Intel, AT&T, Microsoft, Wal-Mart and Nike, proposed a law establishing some minimal rights for workers they employ in China, a proposal opposed by the Chinese government. In fact, it was the Chinese government which proposed the law establishing workers’ rights, and the U.S. corporations which opposed them. We regret any confusion caused by our mistake.

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