| ENTERTAINMENT |
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Batwoman
Returning as Lesbian
Batman and Robin
returning as
heterosexuals. |
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Studio Announces
Straight-to-DVD Movies
Plans to churn out low-budget stinkers so
bad they'll become oddball cult favorites
in the future. |
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| BUSINESS |
|
Microsoft Explains Delay in Release Of New
Windows Operating System
Computers were down. |
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Washington Nationals Revenue Continues
to Soar Due to New Seating Arrangement |
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| SCIENCE |
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2,400-Year-Old Scroll Left on
Funeral Pyre Deciphered by New Technology
It reads: "Place kindling, larger
pieces of wood on pyre, light scroll,
stand back." |
|
Study: Arctic Was Once Like
Florida
Hot, humid, lots of bad drivers. |
| |
| |
 Obesity
Epidemic in Cats
Causes Concern
Experts blame too much
TV, not enough mice. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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Study: Teens Who Pledge
Chastity Until Marriage Often Lie
As do teens who claim they're getting a
lot of action. |
|
Schools in Several States
Sending Home Notes Saying,
“Your Child Is Fat”
Especially helpful for parents who are
only dimly aware they have a
child. |
| |
| RELIGION |
|
Vatican Rumor: Pope John Paul II
On Fast Track to Sainthood
Vatican bookmakers say he's already neck
and neck with Mother Teresa. |
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