| BOOKS |
 |
 |
Bin Laden's
Sister-in-Law Promoting
Book
She's making the
rounds of talk shows
hawking "The Bin
Laden Low-Carb
Diet." |
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| POLITICS |
|
GOP Alarmed At Edwards's
Inexperience
Novice senator could launch
invasion of wrong country to deter
nonexistent threat. |
| |
| ODDS AND ENDS |
|
 Man Takes Top
Prize Eating 3 Pounds of
Baked Beans In 10 Minutes
Judges award prize in
absentia. |
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| SPORTS |
|
Baseball: Player Hits for
Cycle
Singles, doubles, triples, then denies
steroid use. |
|
Scheduling Snafu Disrupts
Tour de France
When both events fall on the same day,
Pamplona's "running of the bulls" gets
priority. |
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 |
| As
usual, the networks experiment
with new fare during the summer,
when many people are away. Here
are some of the shows you'll
probably miss: |
| "Pet Swap" (ABC):
Applying the spouse-swapping
concept to pets works just fine
when a parakeet is traded for a
python, but when a Pomeranian
named Eugene changes places with
a Chihuahua named Pepe, time
grinds to a halt. |
| "Celebrity Stoolie"
(CBS): If you're a B-list
celebrity and your agent calls
with an offer from this latest
exercise in public humiliation,
hang up. Otherwise, you might
find yourself posting bail after
someone like Pia Zadora tips off
the cops that you're driving
a stolen car. |
| "Democratic National
Convention" (CNN),
"Republican National
Convention" (Fox): These two
spoofs of the political
nominating process are not to be
missed. Deft portrayals by some
of our finest comic actors
provide the loopy cast of
characters. They're all
here: the mock-serious news
anchors who repeat the same
information endlessly; the
shallow, scripted politicians
spouting bumper sticker slogans;
the political wives, on constant
auto-smile while secretly
drinking themselves into a
stupor. You'll laugh so hard
you'll cry. |
| "The Olympics" (NBC):
Avoid this snoozer. 964 hours of
commercials, pre-packaged
profiles, commercials,
tape-delayed events, and more
commercials. Here, I'll save
you some time: the Russians win
weightlifting, Americans win
track and field, Brazil soccer,
Cuba boxing, China table tennis,
Australia swimming, and Lithuania
basketball. |
| (Mr. TV is on vacation. His
column is being written by Mrs.
TV.) |
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