| SPACE |
 |
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MISSION TO
MARS BEGINS
Spacecraft will try to
determine if men are from
there |
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| |
| TRENDS |
|
 |
| Skin Area Covered by Tattoos on
Athletes, Celebrities Passes Area Covered on Old
Sailors |
|
| |
| SOCIETY |
|
Former
President Enjoying
Retirement
Clinton's become a regular at
sixties-themed costume
parties. |
|
 |
|
|
 |
| Insiders
tell me First Lady Laura Bush
and Rev. Al Sharpton
are in the midst of a torrid love
affair — and right under the noses
of the Secret Service and White
House security! |
| Those in the know at Foggy Bottom
tell us Colin Powell
has taken to some odd satanic
practices, including animal
sacrifice and the administering
of deadly curses. Stay tuned! |
| Savvy bean-counters over at OMB
reveal this little-noticed tidbit
buried way down in President Bush's
budget proposal: $10 million
specifically earmarked
for "prostitutes, masseuses,
and dominatrixes" to service
our commander-in-chief. That last
item, dominatrixes, raised a few
eyebrows. |
| Final bombshell: Dick Cheney
died on the operating table last
November. The man we see today is
a marvelous actor and
impersonator, Barry Ponville.
He's doing a great job running
things, we think. Until next
time. |
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