| POLITICS |
FirstAmendmentLand
to Replace Actual First Amendment
Park visitors
will exercise civil liberties
aided by goofy cartoon
characters. |
 |
|
| |
| SHOW BUSINESS |
 |
Garbage Barge Signs
Kathie Lee Gifford
Star will do promotional appearances
at landfills, dumps. |
|
Studios Running Out of New Ideas
Will have to close. |
| |
| BUSINESS NEWS |
|
Sudden Market Drop More
Of a Hiccup, Say Analysts
Not quite a belch or fart. |
| |
PIEDMONT-HEFFERNAN
DISASTER
LATEST
DEVELOPMENTS:
Skies clearing, unfortunately. |
|
|
|
|
Senate Blocks Use of Female
Crash Dummy
Smaller testing device subject to
unpredictable mood swings, isn't logical. |
|
Prison Vouchers Proposed by
Inmates
"Give us a choice," say
recently convicted felons. |
| |
 ASTROPHYSICS
Hubble Surprise:
Universe Only 500 Years Old
Objects in mirror are
closer than they appear. |
|
|
| |
| NUTRITION |
|
Potato Chips May Contain Asphalt
But not in harmful quantities, says FDA. |
| |
| CORRECTION |
|
Last week we published the names and
addresses of convicted child molesters
who live within a twenty-five mile radius
of the 50 largest American cities.
Unfortunately, the wrong list of names
appeared. We apologize for any confusion. |
|
